i miss you.

After someone dies, people always seem to tell you that it will get better with time. That's a lie. It doesn't get better, the pain doesn't go away... you learn to live with it. It's like a piece of you is gone and your body continues to function but you won't ever be whole again. It will be 10 years in November since my dad passed away. But in just 5 days, it is his birthday. He would have been 63. It's weird how much you can take for granted when someone is alive. It's sad actually. You may not tell your friends and your family how much they mean to you on a daily basis, who does? But what if that was the last day you could ever tell them how important they were to you? All of those little things... the fights with your friends, the bickering with your parents, rolling your eyes at your crazy family... are all of those little things really the memories that you want to be left with? I don't think so. When someone who means the entire world to you dies, your life changes, and it will never be the same. I still think about him every single day. Literally. Ten years has not changed how much I miss him or how often I think of him. Time doesn't make it easier... it almost makes it harder. It makes it harder to remember how his laugh sounded or how he smelled. I can remember the little things... watching Monday Night Football and riding in the car singing "bye bye miss american pie." Those things that meant nothing at the time are all that I have left to hold onto, and I hold on for dear life. So if the memories are all that you will be left with, I urge you to make the very most of them. Every chance that you have to spend time with the people that you love, do it. And treasure it.